This is the first time I've really been ready to be DONE with pregnancy. I'm wondering if it's been all the extra hormones I've received, but my body just doesn't feel the same as in the other pregnancies. I'm exhausted, emotional, impatient, and now to the point where I'm worrying about going into labor with any simple activity like washing the dishes. Today I spent about 4 hours in bed this afternoon; I didn't sleep because Steven Joseph was awake, but I just laid there wishing I was out of this predicament!
I feel blessed to be carrying this sweet baby, and so excited to meet him or her...and to find out if it's a him or her! And to actually choose a name! I love babies and know I'll enjoy carrying that sweet baby around with me every day. But in the same way, I'm very scared about the surgery and recovery, and just hoping that I'll feel more emotionally stable post-partum than I have been in pregnancy.
So to try to be a little more positive tonight, let's think of all the fun things about having a new baby that I can get excited about!
~Finding out the gender and choosing a name!
~New baby cuddles and nursings
~Little Newborn clothes and diapers
~Making the most of my hospital stay, which I usually enjoy as a mini-vacation with all the TV, "room service," and extra help from nurses with no chores to do!
~Using my Moby wrap, sling, and new Beco carrier
~Hopefully finding a new (used) baby swing and glider rocker to rock my sweet baby to sleep!
~Washing the little baby clothes and blankets
~Going on our first outings as a family of SIX!
~Baptizing our sweet baby (need to figure this out!)
And now that I've griped at the kids to clean up all evening, and do actually have a sleeping toddler boy (who didn't take a nap today), the girls and I are going to enjoy the rest of the night watching last night's America's Got Talent episode! Missing Daddy who is out tonight, but looking forward to seeing Baby on ultrasound tomorrow and then our First Friday Little Flowers class on Friday!
5 comments:
I'll say some extra prayers for you.
It's lovely how you focus on the positive, but I know how easy it is to fall into the worries and hrad parts.
I am only 14 weeks and already thinking of that c-section recovery time. I am also telling Paul that I'm 'too told' this time around...even though my friends European friends laugh and tell me that 32 is when they just started thinking of having babies and I'm already on my 5th! 32 just seems different than 25. (Probably mostly because I'm responsible for four kids right now instead of just myself as I was at 25!).
On the other side of the blog we are your cheerleaders. We are happily awaiting the big day and happy to offer prayer support. I just wish I could come and cook and clean for you or do something more tangible. Hopefully you'll be able to feel my prayers.
We are cheering you on Blair. I am a bit anxious this time around too. It really helps to have a super supportive hubby and older kids to help (Joshua is 11, and Rebecca is 8.5). But still, by the end of the day...I'm beat, and I'm only 15 weeks along. But all I can do is take it one day at a time, and try not to focus on the rest. If I don't think about it all, it doesn't overwhelm me. Ask Mary our Mother to wrap her arms around you!
Hang in there, Blair! Prayers!! It's going to be awesome...
I found with each one I got worse about what I thought about. With each preganacy I learned more about what could go wrong. I don't think it is age as much as it is knowledge. Please know that you are not alone. It isn't easy thanks to Eve but it will soon be over. Try to picture Christmas this year with a new little one starting to smile back at you. Picture your little ones loving on that gift from heaven. If that doesn't work I always find comfort in the smell of a new born sized diaper. They are so cute and smell so precious. You will be in my prayers.
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